I searched in Google for
pictures of my name Chris.
Every photograph of the
men named Chris, was a
portrait of a man's face
named Chris. Since Chris
is also a woman's name,
I wondered why there 
were no pictures of women
named Chris. So, I searched
for "Chris female" and
got photographs of women
with their arms around
men, some naked women,
model type women, mostly
full  body photographs,
but no portrait shots.
So, I searched again for
"what is Google sexism?"
and got pictures of 
women alone, like three
of them, with pieces of
paper taped to their mouths
with words about women
on some, and words about men
on others, which were pictures
of three men. I looked
a little further and saw
a pornographic photograph.

The Dumb-Shit Sutra

Hearing a thought of
"Everyday life is no other
than Nirvana" and being
jerked inside of your 
head where you see a
vision of your face
before your parents were
born and then being
jerked so that you see
the world in front of 
you and it looks so 
beautiful that you jump
out of your chair with
a great feeling of
exhilaration and then
you sense door after
door in your mind opening
up, unlocking countless
rooms, and this happens
after your first attempt
at meditation without
any teacher having
taught you how and
without any drugs being
involved, is enlightenment 
and also the beginning
of schizophrenia. No shit.
This happened to me.
              II
Heating up a can of wax
beans is also enlighten-
ment.
              III
Sitting in a chair when
it is exactly eight
o'clock and the thought
pops into your head
of "Laundry" is also
enlightenment.
              IV
I think all composers of
music compose in the 
same way, except for
differences in their
procedures, like Mozart
composing on a billiard table,
or John Cage throwing dice,
or Beethoven writing
in a notebook, or me
not knowing a thing
about how it sounds.
              V
Improvisers compose,
perform and are an
audience all at the 
same time. They all
know what they are 
doing. There are only
different degrees
of knowledge.
              VI
Another kind of
enlightenment that I
experienced was when
I wrote down the
word "Another" and had
an intentional thought
of writing a poem, and
then had an unintentional
thought of recording
music, and then
it occurred to me to roll
cigarettes, because that
was the right thing to
do at that time, for me.
              VII
My mother said that she 
thought there was no
such thing as enlightenment.
John Cage wrote:
enlightenment equals 
     no enlightenment.
Buddha said that there
was no such thing as
enlightenment and then
he said...Ahh, but there is
such a thing as enlightenment.
I say everything is 
     enlightenment.
Samu Sunim taught that
the first thought was
the enlightened thought
and the second thought
was the Buddha thought,
so, obviously, every thought
is enlightened.
              VIII
Haju Sunim had an experience
that her teacher said
was her enlightenment.
She looked at the moon
and couldn't tell if she
was the moon or if the
moon was her.
              IX
A friend practiced
meditation for the
first time, and I
noticed that he looked
a little more crumpled
and depressed. I thought
that was due to his
enlightenment. Of  course,
he was already enlightened,
because he is a nice
guy, which is possibly
better than enlight-
enment.
              X
A Zen master saw a
radiant, loving light
and came out of his
meditation, crying, and
so decided to teach Zen.
An illiterate mental 
patient who I know, who
thought he was the
reincarnation of Cain,
told me he saw a bright,
white light. My brother
had a near-death
experience and saw
 a bright white light.
I have never seen a
bright, white light
except for electric lights,
and the computer, etc.
              IX
I once had an experience
where I was sitting on
a chair on a patio, and
everything disappeared
completely, including me,
and it was not like you
might think, like that I
saw a void or anything,
because I wasn't there to
see anything. The emptiness
didn't exist. It was like
there wasn't anything.
I don't know how I knew
anything about it, except 
briefly after it happened
I was back sitting on
a chair on the patio, and
my forty year old headache
was gone, and I jumped up
and started dancing. My
sister came out and
joined me and my headache
came back. I knew
that time existed
before the disappearance
and that time existed
after the experience,
but I perceived afterward
that there was no time
or space during
the disappearance.
              XII
Bob Dylan said "Don't think
twice, it's alright" and
I always wondered what
that meant. So just now
I had a thought to
have a bologna sandwich
and I didn't have another
thought. So then I had
another thought of
"Oh, I get it!, it's alright!".
              XIII
A friend was walking
in a park with a lady
who practiced yoga. They
were picking flowers
and my friend woke up.
The lady said, "That must
be satori". He told me
it was like a big room.
              XIIII
One way to think of in, is
inside the body/mind. One way
to think of out is outside
the body/mind. They are both
out. One way to think of in
is down toward the center
of the earth. Another way
to think of out, is up towards
outer space. They are both
out. One way to think of in,
is inside of your house.
One way to think of out, is
outside of your house. They
are both out. One way to
think of in, is inside of
that universe. There 
probably is no outside of
the universe. One way to
think of out is out there
in the universe. We are
all inside of the universe.
The universe is everyday,
ordinary life.
     I suggest giving
freely to anyone, if it
will help them.
              END

Poetry Diarrhea

Poetry diarrhea
is a sickness.
To write a poem,
because you should,
is also a sickness.
Looking up diarrhea,
because you don't know
how to spell it,
is healthy.
Knowing that two r's
come before the h
is also healthy.
Diarrhea is usually
not healthy.
Looking up diarrhea twice
because you forgot
how it was spelled
the first time,
so you had to look it up
another time,
could be considered
healthy, but maybe not.
Knowing when to stop
is paramount.
Looking up paramount,
because you have doubts
about your spelling
ability, and finding that
you spelled it right
in the first place,
can make you laugh
uncontrollably.
When you're done
writing your poem,
you could sit
and experience
shortness of breath.
I was once told
that shortness of breath
was not good.
I was not sure
that he was right,
but he probably was.
You could put your pen
down at the end,
and go blow your nose.
If you pick your pen
up again, you will
probably keep writing.
Sometimes, you just
have to control 
yourself and stop.
Of course, you might keep
going, in which case,
it will be a longer
poem. Since you know
that you could have stopped
after the first five
lines, but you decided
to keep writing
anyway, you might
continue until you
feel that the poem
has ended.
Then you might reread
it and decide
that the word "forget"
that you had debated
using, would be better
spelled "forgot". 
You might cross out
something.
You might wonder what
the poem means.

I think that a normal
person, if he's thinking
about somebody, alive or
dead, thinks in a monologue.
This monologue starts
with an intentional
thought, followed by an
unintentional thought,
then back to an
intentional thought
and so on.
     In a person with what
is called an abnormal
mind, the first thought
is intentional, so it is
thought to be the
person's own self, and
then the unintentional
thought is split off,
so there is a dialogue
between the intentional
self thought and the 
unintentional other thought.
This creates the
illusion of a dialogue
between the self and
another. This is a
condition of "hearing voices".

In a person who channels
the dead, this is the
same thing. The self
voice thinks of a dead
person, and the unintentional
thought is seen as the
other, in an illusion
of one person talking
to a dead person.
When this dialogue
thinking occurs, someone
might think they are
talking to a neighbor, or
someone sitting next to
them, so they might
think they are telepathic.
All of these ways of
thinking are a creation
of the mind, which makes
sense of things in
different ways.

In Zen meditation, an
experienced meditator
sees the carpet or wall
in front of him, and
the mind puts together
the patterns of the
carpet in new ways,
much like one sees
objects in an abstract
painting. This could be
faces, demons, alien
looking things, Jesus,
insects, etc. The
meditator is advised
to simply look and
to concentrate with
energy on his breath
or mantra or koan.
With enough concentration
effort, the hallucination
disappears.
     In the case of someone
who hears voices outside
of themselves, the same
thing happens. The person
hears a sound and the
mind makes sense of it,
like the faces in a 
rug pattern, by creating
illusory voices. If the
person is thinking
intentionally or unintentionally
of a certain person,
the voices that the mind
creates may sound like
the person that he is thinking
of. This is also
called "hearing voices".
     Normal people and
spiritual people can
experience these same
things and not be troubled
and mentally ill people
can experience the same
things, except that it causes
them problems. The 
difference between a 
normal person and an
abnormal person then
is the severity of 
suffering, not
necessarily a difference
of the mind, but only
a difference of what
is perceived as
suffering. So, if
we say doctor and
patient, there may
be nothing more than
a doctor with a degree
of, say, 3 on a severity
scale and a patient
with a degree of 7
on the scale. It is
one sick person treating
another.
     In Zen, a student
learns a practice called
"Katz". One way that it
is done is to strike
a chair with a stick
hard and scream at 
the top of his lungs
"Katz!". This releases
built up tension and
stress, and the student
feels better. The
master with him might
approve. This is intentional.
     What if a schizophrenic
person in a hospital hits
a chair with a stick in 
the hospital, and yells
"Katz!". Again, this relieves
tension and stress and
the patient feels better.
The nurse next to him
is likely to express
disapproval for
unacceptable behavior
and other disciplinary
action may follow. This
is intentional for patient
and nurse.
    In Zen interviews
students scream, swear,
jump over the master,
and other seemingly
irrational behaviors
in order to show their
understanding, wisdom
and liberation to the
master.
A master strangled
a student and nearly
killed him to teach
him a lesson about death.

If a mentally ill person
does these actions,
intentionally, like the
student or the master,
what is the effect?
What would the patient
be diagnosed with?
Police, being tasered,
restraints, ambulances,
confinement, medication,
hospitalization, etc.

The difference is the
rating on the severity
scale. Low suffering
happens in Zen, high
suffering happens in
mental illness. You could
say there is no qualitative
difference, only a
quantitative difference.
An enlightened Zen master
then, is no more sane
than a mentally ill
person. The difference
is the degree of pain.
     A sane person who
exhibits these behaviors
has different
effects, with no qualitative
difference, except a 
greater or lesser
amount of suffering.
     The obvious conclusion
of this is that mental
patients suffer from
a greater amount of pain,
and Zen masters, students,
nurses, doctors, and what
are called sane people
suffer from a lesser
amount of pain.
     The difference is
quantity, not quality.

     A temple
     is little Zen,
     everyday life
     is medium Zen,
     and a mental hospital
     is big Zen.
     It hurts everywhere.

     A woman doing her
laundry may be in as
much pain as a doctor
treating a patient, and
the patient being treated,
or a Zen master
or a student.

     So, we can make another
conclusion that there
is no qualitative or
quantitative difference
in health or sickness,
mentally or physically
between any of them.
Society makes differences.
"The only difference
between a madman and me
is that I am not mad"
     Salvador Dali

"The only difference
between a madman and
me is none"
     Kongsaeng Chris Everson

"Some believe that there
is no such thing as
mental illness"
     Andreas Marcotty, MD

     One might then think
that people are all the
same. Our quantities are
different and our 
qualities are different,
yet we are all similar.

"We are all in this
together, alone"
     Kongsaeng Chris Everson
     with help
     from another
     Zen student
     and Lily Tomlin

"If someone is thinking
about me, I am probably
thinking about them"
     Kongsaeng and Muji